Deuteronomy - Cycle One - 0712-1125 - Ekev

The word ekev has many meanings… if only, because, as a reward, it shall come to pass. Therefore, in the Torah portion Ekev, there’s an understanding of if this, then that. If we the Israelites are good then we are blessed. But there’s also if not this, then that. If we the Israelites are not good, we will be cursed. There’s a fine line between if not this and if this, one so fine you almost feel you should be tiptoeing through this Torah portion.

The one translation of ekev, if only, are words used in grief, in regret. If only we had done this, we would be satisfied. Ekev, therefore, is not about punishment and reward. Nor is it about the light we get to flitter about in if we’re good Israelites. It’s about the tight intertwining of despair and darkness with divine consciousness (see Genesis 1‐4). It’s about the necessary unraveling of fear from our divine sparks as we spiral towards the radiant center. The irony is that it is our very humanity that creates the intertwining. We don’t mean to do it. We can’t help it. As humans, we need to identify ourselves with our immediate environment. As humans, if our environment is ravishing, then we identify with that. However, simply through the process of identification with divine consciousness, we corrupt it. We stop the flow, try to horde it, fear it, doubt it, try to own it, and try to own God. So, what do we do?

The first teaching in Ekev is awareness. We need to know the details of our situation in order to handle it. The next teaching is how to unravel despair and darkness from the spiral of light, how we are to behave, what we must and must not do (VaEthchanan 4‐9). The final teaching is how to handle a situation in which, for whatever reason, we forget and the pain (sewn in with the light) spirals towards the center and grabs at our breath, at our whole world, our sacred universe.

So, what is our situation, our sacred universe? Well, it’s not bad. All we need to do is keep the covenant and God will love us, bless us and make us numerous ((7‐13). He will also bless the fruit of our wombs, of our land, our grain, our wine. Yes, God sends us His divine sparks, loves us and we love Him. We spiral towards His center and carry His divine sparks and create more, embracing them into God, into us. To look into this further, in many Torah portions (Pinchas for example) we witness offering after offering, the many sacrifices, the many divine sparks bringing more love into our core, radiating out to all of the world. We let the light clean our hearts and minds, solidify God’s love into words (VaEthchanan 6‐4 and Ekev 11‐18). We give thanks that we are carriers of the divine, holding buckets of sun and star shine, pouring it like rivers to all beings, drinking it in to our hearts and minds, expanding and transforming. Just glance at the writings of Isaiah. It’s a nice trip. And it’s real. It can happen every moment if we choose.

What else is real? First, that we’re human and it’s hard to avoid getting stuck in darkness, in self doubt, self righteousness, over‐confidence, or memories of past mistakes. Supposedly, the vibration of divine consciousness is so great that it repels all of the above. God will take all sickness from us (7‐15). God your Lord is with you‐ a great and awesome God. In fact, in Ekev, there’s line after line of all the ways God (or this active cycle of divine light) will knock out all despair and fear. In my opinion, all of this reassurance means that we, as humans, need it. We can be moving about happily in our worlds and something bad can happen and this seed can grow like a cancer. Suddenly we doubt the whole process. And soon, accordingly, we are no longer a part of it. The message here is to pay attention. Doubt is there. It’s not going to go away. We need to constantly unravel it from the spiral of light.

This interweaving is such an integral part of our experience of the divine that to describe it takes away from the dangers of its subtle influence. Instead, we need to see and feel the interweaving in the lines (and therefore in our bodies). For example, in the lines, the greatness of God is sewn in with all the ways that God can destroy our enemies (reassuring us). Moving on, in the lines, the greatness of God is sewn in with all the ways we, as human beings, mess up because we think we deserve the glory.

This brings us to mistakes caused by self righteousness and over‐confidence. Yes, when things are going well it’s easy to say it was because of my own strength (8‐17) or my great virtue (9‐4). In other words, we like to believe we get the big cycle of radiance on our doorposts, on our hearts and in our minds because of our great work, our studying and good deeds, that we are more enlightened, successful, artistic, talented, devoted, musical, spiritual, gentler, finer, that we get the prayers and others don’t, that our light shines farther, that God therefore loves us more…that we are God Himself, that we own Him, that we own ourselves, that we own the land. It’s easy to pretend we have some new trick up our sleeves because we are the guru, the big doo‐dah healer, the millionaire expanding and expanding ad nauseum. Well we can just about trash those pretensions. They won’t work. We can look at Behar in Leviticus and the Jubilee for more information on ownership. Needless to say, if we try to own God we’re thrown out of divine consciousness as fast as we can say abracadabra (9‐8).

Finally, what else is human? How else do we manage to sabotage our great gift of light from God? Easy! We are stuck in ways we’ve sabotaged it in the past. In Ekev we get the story of two sets of tablets. It seems that Moses climbs Mt Horeb, fasts for forty days and nights, and receives two stone tablets written with God’s finger (Ekev 9‐10 and Exodus 31‐18). When Moses comes down from the mountain, the people are praying to a gilded calf. So Moses throws down the tablets, breaking them before our eyes. On another level, Moses has to protect God’s light (manifested in stone), protect the divine from the despair, fear and idolatry of the people. When the second tablets are then created (and Moses fasts for forty days and nights again) they are placed in an arc for protection. During the telling of this whole story Moses is chastising the Israelites. We have a look what you did type of monologue (9‐21). How do we get beyond that story? How do we forgive ourselves? How can we unravel all of that darkness from the spiral of light that leads us to God’s very foundation, that creates the heartbeat of divine consciousness, the breath?

What can we do? What can we do to get beyond our humanity? The beauty is that we are told. We are to remove the barriers from our heart (10‐16), bless God as he blesses us (8‐10), recognize the beauty of God’s light and safeguard it (8‐1), stay away from idolatry (8‐19) and when it comes to the past and being stuck in darkness, we are to get moving (10‐11). We know how to get moving. We just need to remember the Zered brook (Devarim 2‐13), We know how to do all of the above. Easier said than done but at least it is said.

Finally, sometimes in life the unraveling is hard. There is so much fear and despair interwoven in our cells, in our bodies, in our words, in our picture of ourselves and of others and in the whole universe that we say things we don’t mean, do things that hurt, forget that our connection with God begs humility. It would seem we need the finest forks of lightning to detangle the dross from the radiance, to spiral into the divine with the purest of intentions, the clean light that God has emphasized in just about every portion in Torah.

I think that in Ekev darkness and light are sewn in so intricately with each word that you could see it as an emphasis on moments. We can’t let a moment pass without focus and attention. We can’t let a moment pass without busily unraveling the darkness from the light, getting that clear perspective that ultimately leads to the exquisite sound of God. Divine consciousness is not about sitting in it. It’s about the work involved in unraveling, the awareness and recognition of that sacred action.

And if we mess up? Well, we need to take responsibility, and look at each detail with scrutiny. Then we need to get moving.

So, may we know and be thankful for the cycle of love and light that embraces and creates us. May we know ourselves and our weaknesses so we can accept and work with them. May we spiral into the center of God, His divine light, with more love than enough, more radiance than enough, more divine sparks with each transformation and return. May we feel each moment as new, feel it as our sight and hearing pierces through even the darkest of despair. May we unravel the darkness that we don’t even see or hear. And in so doing, may we arrive once again at the place of Shema, at the core of God, with new beauty and light to heal all hearts. May we reflect and bless God as He offers his blessing to us.